The Banned For Life Show

B4L_05_16_12

In our follow-up to the last show with Eric Taub, we keep it high-brow by opening the show up with a pleasant story about vomiting, soiled diapers, and Palmolive gloves. This leads to a rousing discussion about portable toilets that spans the globe. Space exploration comes up for some damn reason and I think we finally figured out the meaning of life. Probably.

Remember to check out Auralgasm.org for the only podcasts on the internet you should care about. Lee Kelly from Talking Questions Podcast had to steal a lot of money from church to pay for the site. The least you could do is check out Auralgasm.org and make his unspeakable crimes worth something. He’s probably going to Hell for this.  Do it, you godless animals.

B4L_05_03_12

The Banned For Life Show gets slightly serious in this episode with a fascinating interview with Eric Taub from I Begin Again Treatment Centers. Eric is an expert at addiction-interruption using Ibogaine, a centuries old psychoactive alkaloid with a history rooted in Western Africa. Ibogaine has been shown to stop heroin withdrawals after years of daily use in as little as one session. Don’t worry, we still find time to make it horrible with stories of AA/NA meetings and other childish endeavors.

More Information about Eric’s practice and Ibogaine

Be sure to check out auralgasm.org, our proud podcasting network created by Lee Kelly from Talking Questions podcast. It’s not another listing page for just any podcast. These ripe peaches have been hand-picked to insure freshness. Check it out before you roast in Hell, you godless heathens!

B4L_04_04_12

Oh god. What have we done?

Topic include:

Weight loss, swinger clubs, sex toys, is this racist?, ugly porn stars, odd fetishes that could quite possibly exist, oh yeah and 9/11

Warning: Not for Parvesh

Also, be sure to check out a cool new podcast network we have joined up with here: http://auralgasm.org/

B4L_03_05_12

Topics include:

Absurd Japanese commercials, being disappointed by actors, the smell of cocoa-butter changes everything, sweaty cracks, female rapists, electronic cigarettes, blackne, and some possible public nudity loopholes

B4L_02_21_12 – Strumming Fingers

Topics include:

iPads, Pirates, Susan Boyle, Mike Tyson, Chris Brown, Oscar snubs of the past, and we judge the following movies based solely on their covers:

All of this followed by an abrupt end to the show. Enjoy!

B4L_02_05_12

Topics include:

If I could kill a man, lucid dreaming, strokes, arguing with actors, quitting smoking, blowing the lid right off/it turns you into a monster, Heroin Bears, b-list serial killers, hitchhikers, Michiganders, and reverse jungle fever

powerful stuff

B4L 01_22_12

After almost a month off, Leo and I return with possibly the least SFW show we’ve done.

Topics include:

Tyler Perry, Asians aren’t that smart, The Art of War, floating caskets, exotic cookbooks, Hot Publix, female self-mutilation, growing up, prank calls, pranking the dead, Leo’s new book, and Mtv

Porn topics include:

German and Japanese porn, wandering into the wrong section of an adult store, becoming desensitized, and grooming habits

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Included topics:

Fats’ appearance on another podcast and Leo’s history with them

bug-chasers, things men do after sex, the movie Nell, police etiquette, giants,

life-qualification exams, and your grandmother puts out

MUSIC: The Breeders – Cannonball, The Lotus Sutra

B4L 12_18_11

In our poor excuse for a Christmas show, Leo and I discuss the following:

Water-skiing, Celebrity siblings, Canadian cartels, Being a real f*cking man, Violent pornography, and we even find time to talk about Christmas movies!

MUSIC: Eric Idle – F*ck Chrismas, The Sex Pistols – Jingle Bells, Tiny Tim – Santa Claus has got the AIDS this year

B4L 11_26_11 – You Trippin

This whole episode is pretty much about psychedelic experiences Leo and I both had since recording last time. The first block ends with our friend Zimbolt’s song “Hal’s Logic Error”

Find more of his music HERE

MUSIC: Zimbolt – Hal’s Logic Error, Blur – Chinese Bombs, Booker T and the MGs – Green Onions, The Doors – 5 to 1

B4L 11_08_11 – Huffing Gas

Sodas of the past, regular funletts, the madness of Florida, animal cruelty, ag classes, Craigslist, manhood, There are no cool meth stories…, Pretty much just drugs.

MUSIC: Sham 69 – Borstal Breakout, Amy Winehouse – Valerie, House Of Pain – Back From The Dead, Monster Magnet – Powertrip

B4L 10_26_11 – Dog Tossing

Block 1 opens with a sick track from one of my favorite Irish MC’s (Redzer featuring Terawrizt) with “I’m Back” This track, along with several others can be found at the Class A’z shop on our Friends Of The Show Page. The video will also be available there. Check out these guys and show them some love, whydoncha. In this block we talk about answering machines, phones, education=nothing, southern cooking, and Leo’s dad.

Remakes, Point Break is awesome, Conquerors, and Fats telling tripping stories

Drugs

MUSIC: Class A’z – I’m Back, Georgia Satellites – Keep Your Hands To Yourself, The White Stripes – My Doorbell, Flogging Molly – Whiskey In The Jar

B4L 10_09_11 – Know you’re alive

First off, the sound quality for block one is utterly horrible. This is explained (and apologized for) several times later. We briefly talk about Nirvana and classic rock, but rocket into male grooming, torturing your generals “to know you are alive”, The Fred Flintstone, poetry of the p*nis, and end with watersports.

Technical difficulties start up the second block. We talk about people who may have strange fetishes, listen to a tribute to Nirvana, and go on a rant about learning to play guitar.

I didn’t re-listen to this block, so I only remember a little. I know we talked about a judge in Alabama, how horrible the south can be, giant chimps, and psychedelic experiences.

MUSIC: Slayer – Public Display Of Dismemberment, Breathe Control – Blackout, Cannibal Corpse – She Was Asking For It, Slayer – War Ensemble

B4L 09_23_11 – Movies, Pat

Fats had a bit too much to drink prior to recording this late-night installment which leads to a discussion on alcohol and drug abuse. Also, a lovely trip to the DMV is covered.

We talk movies in this block and ponder if the Michael Bay/Jerry Bruckheimer team may be the evil twins of the Coen Brothers. This segways into Fats telling Leo about possibly the most disturbing film he has seen.

We’re still stuck in movie talk for the first bit of Block3 but we find time to talk about how incredibly insane the rock stars of the 50′s were. Also, Pat Murphy checks in to open the block.

MUSIC: Class Az – Off The Wall, Primus – Tommy The Cat, GMC featuring Nu-Centz and Collie – Do It Again

B4L 09_11_11 – Drowning Men

The show opens with a riveting conversation about Fats’ new glasses and trips to the eye doctor. When that wild ride calms down, Fats talks about going to see The Drowning Men with Alkaline Trio and mewithoutyou. We set up the next block by talking about the difficulties of getting into The House of Blues with a digital recorder.

Fats interviews friend of the show Nato from The Drowning Men behind The House of Blues. Sorry that the quality is sub-par. Complaints can be directed to The House of Blues security department. Enjoy!

We talk about hipsters and Pabst Blue Ribbon. Fats tells Leo about an encounter he had with a relative of his girlfriend on the opening day of NCAA Football, which gets a very passionate reaction from him.

MUSIC: New Bomb Turks – Bachelor’s High, The Drowning Men – Courageous Son, Dropkick Murphys – Shipping Up To Boston, Johnny Russell – Rednecks, White Socks, and Blue Ribbon Beer

B4L 08_25_11 – Best and Worst of

We open the show talking movies. Leo and Fats both mention a couple of films they’ve seen in the last couple of weeks. Continuing on, we discuss how horrible horror movies have become lately and don’t get much farther than that.

Block2 continues with the movie theme as Fats quizzes Leo on character actors. We like to refer to these actors as “that guy” actors. We end the block with Orson Welles doing an amazing champagne commercial.

Since we have gained some new listeners in the last couple of months, Fats decided to go back to some older shows and pull a “best-of” reel for our newer listeners. Most of these segments will be new to you as the first dozen of so shows were utterly terrible at best. The quality is not too great as we were still finding our feet and were without the equipment we use now. Still, if you like what you’ve heard so far, we think you’ll enjoy some history of The Banned For Life Show. As always, thanks for listening!

MUSIC: Slipknot – Eyeless, NOFX – Liza and Louise, and a whole lot more!

B4L 08_09_11 – Beach Birthday

The show starts with Leo being accused of being Jewish and him vehemently insisting he is not. We move on to discuss how ridiculous marijuana laws in The United States really are.

Block 2 begins with Leo getting exposed to a video of a disturbing manchild lipsynching the lyrics of a Katy Perry song. We move on to insult and degrade obese people and their children. We address remarks made by another podcast that we may be a bit racist and finish the show off with stories from a recent trip to Daytona Beach involving sex, drugs, and modern jazz.

MUSIC: Jello Biafra & Mojo Nixon – Will The Fetus Be Aborted, The Presidents of the United States of America – We’re Not Gonna Make It , Rawsoul and The Dirty Dubsters – UFO’s (Don’t Mean A Thing), Roger Alan Wade – Butt Ugly Slut

B4L 07_26_11 – Hey Neighbor

We open the show discussing Norway, Amy Winehouse, and find a way to tie the two
together with talking about gun ownership. Leo and Fats both get stuck doing Jessee Ventura  impressions, we briefly touch on cartoon logic, and we talk about a new podcast you should check out.

Horrible racism dominates the second block as Fats talks about some interesting censorship he saw in a movie on cable. I wish there was more to this block than that, but you gotta take what you can get.

The curious case of Pat Murphy

MUSIC: System Of A Down – Bounce , The Rolling Stones – Short ‘N Curlies, Turbonegro – All My Friends Are Dead, Ice Cube – My Summer Vacation

B4L 07_16_11 – Shower

Leo introduces Fats to the new, hip drug “Crocodile” and Fats needs advice on how to deal with hating your friend’s kids.

A brief discussion about freaks leads Leo to setting up the third block with an interesting caller.  We discuss certain foods that require an immediate trip to the restroom, and Fats tells a horror story about a bad mishap he experienced in the shower.

We talk to Joe From Canada. Some of you may know him as JoeDDM or various other names.
We touch on the topic of Kittydragons and don’t get much farther than that. Also, Fats drinks too much.

MUSIC: Earth Crisis – Gomorrah’s Season Ends, The Drowning Men – Rita,  Sam The Sham and The Pharaohs – Wooly Bully, Foo Fighters – Stacked Actors

B4L 07_02_11 – Crashcast

In case you missed it, Block1 starts out with our Banned For Life tribute to Ryan Dunn. Fats tells us about totaling his car last week and that’s about it for the first block.

Fats finishes his car wreck story, Leo expects sodomy to come into play which leads to addressing exactly how creepy he has been acting lately.  We discuss death and dying which leads to Fats telling the story of watching his father die.

Leo is introduced to the musical stylings of Joe Pesci.  We talk about those Time Life true crime books they used to sell in supermarkets. We also discuss Columbia House and how much of a scam they were. Judge Belvin “The Refigerator” Perry is mentioned and Fats’ voice keeps cracking.

MUSIC: Green Jelly – Three Little Pigs, The Lonely Island – Reba, Slayer – DDAMM, Alabama3 – Woke Up This Morning

B4L Lost

Due to conflicting schedules, Leo and Fats have not been able to record for a while. This is an older show that never aired because it was only two blocks and was never finished. We’ve included something new to start the show off: a five minute long montage of voicemails I received from our favorite caller, Pat Murphy. All of these calls were made in the course of two hours of horrible intoxication. We also offer parenting advice for people with autistic children, discuss movie logic and find out what’s shakin with Michael J Fox. Lastly, we talk about meeting celebrities which bleeds into a deep discussion about professional wrestling. Block2 mainly focuses on a video I found online discussing the phenomena known as “pork rind pussy.” Turns out Leo had seen it years earlier and I was probably a bit late on this one. Even if you’ve heard it before, it stands the test of time. We also dive in to skin-tags and personal grooming.

MUSIC: CIV – Can’t Wait One Minute More, Hall and Oates – Private Eyes, CCR – Keep On Chooglin

B4L 05_26_11 – Go to jail

Hemorrhoids, Being Restrained, In the Jailhouse Now, Cover Songs, Phone Etiquette, Debts, Utilities, Party Houses and the First Bit Ever Recorded By Leo and Fats: What Are Other People Listening To?

MUSIC: Squirrel Nut Zippers – Wash Jones, Marilyn Manson – Get Your Gun, Operation Ivy – Sound System

B4L 05_13_11 – Drinking and Working

Hottest Sauce Re-Cap, Measurements, Bullshitting, Crazy Brits, Drinking (again), Co-Workers, Trust Me, Being THE MAN, The Power of Words, Stand-Up Humoredy, Childbirth

MUSIC: Kinky Friedman – They Aint Makin Jews Like Jesus Anymore, Assjack – Punch, Fight, F*ck, The Irish Rovers – Lily The Pink, Devil Driver – Ripped Apart

B4L 04_30_11 – Dear Woman

Being Put On The Spot, Acting, Remakes, Dear Woman, Voicemails, Visionaries, Pat Murphy

Music: Gnarles Barkley – Smiley Faces, Jerry Reed – She Got The Goldmine, Primus – Wynona’s Big Brown Beaver, Mudvayne – Internal Primates Forever

B4L 04_17_11 – Hottest Sauce

Surprise:Drinking, NyQuil, Licorice, Root Beer, Hangovers, Inner Redneck, Milf Porn, Rum Runners, Fighting Old People, Discussion Forums, Radio, Hip-Hop Jew, Hottest Sauce in the Universe

Music: Dead Kennedys – Terminal Preppie, Elton John – Honkey Cat, Moneybrother – Born Under a Bad Sign, Helmet – Ironhead